you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
