Where are you?
In a non slutty way
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
