There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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