He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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