I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Randomize
