i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
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You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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