the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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