how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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