Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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