I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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