she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
You were trust falling into bushes
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize