Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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