He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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