And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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