So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
