Texts From Last Night

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  (646): View more from New York

  ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!

  (812): View more from Indiana

  ?

  (646): View more from New York

  Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?

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  (646): ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE! (812): ? (646): Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that? http://tfl.nu/5o1s
  Replies (37) Good night (3544) Bad night (753)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.

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  (513): Oh no, it isn't official until she poops. http://tfl.nu/gc75
  Replies (20) Good night (755) Bad night (3500)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on

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  (780): She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on http://tfl.nu/l1qo
  Replies (14) Good night (4238) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.

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  (508): My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that. http://tfl.nu/cfj7
  Replies (7) Good night (3390) Bad night (1116)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.

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  (415): It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year. http://tfl.nu/fhgz
  Replies (19) Good night (5890) Bad night (1359)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball

  (419): View more from Ohio

  And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity

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  (419): We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball (419): And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity http://tfl.nu/7q0o
  Replies (35) Good night (5574) Bad night (1816)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.

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  (724): I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles. http://tfl.nu/o2t1
  Replies (8) Good night (995) Bad night (2433)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside

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  (570): you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside http://tfl.nu/jkpy
  Replies (8) Good night (3277) Bad night (946)
• Favorite

  (435): View more from Utah

  he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!

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  (435): he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?! http://tfl.nu/3uuq
  Replies (19) Good night (1283) Bad night (3676)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way

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  (805): You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way http://tfl.nu/xnwc
  Replies (6) Good night (1855) Bad night (656)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there

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  (509): he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there http://tfl.nu/265p
  Replies (7) Good night (1443) Bad night (476)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.

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  (443): I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon. http://tfl.nu/q1re
  Replies (4) Good night (1009) Bad night (675)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!

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  (714): I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!! http://tfl.nu/1fo4
  Replies (7) Good night (393) Bad night (1128)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips

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  (562): New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips http://tfl.nu/8ne3
  Replies (2) Good night (679) Bad night (379)
• Favorite

  (477): View more from

  YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!

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  (477): YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?! http://tfl.nu/xl4i
  Replies (2) Good night (584) Bad night (210)

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