I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
