I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
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