I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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