I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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