YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
