Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
