Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Fuck me I smell like cheese
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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