he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize