I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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