I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
