were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
