I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
