dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We talked him into tasing himself.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
