Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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