Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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