I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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