i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
time to smoke my breakfast
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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