Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
