Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize
