This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
