I want to walk on stilts...naked
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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