so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
