No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
