So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
