She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize