Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
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