you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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