So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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