Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
