i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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