I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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