just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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