I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
