super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize