TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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