Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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