I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
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As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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